You already recognize that you have a problematic relationship with casino gaming, sports betting, daily fantasy sports (DFS), racing, lottery, or some other game/event of chance. You have been able to successfully abstain thus far, either through self-exclusion and/or with the help of counseling. You have even returned to enjoying activities that were sidelined during your struggle with gambling, with competitive sports among friends (or in a community league) being among the most beneficial from a physical and mental wellbeing perspective.
However, as with any competitive sport, be it pick-up basketball, tennis, pickleball, a round of golf with buddies, or beer league softball, fellow competitors have probably suggested that you make things a little more “interesting” with a wager. The wager may be money, the first round at the bar after the game is done, or some other thing of value. It seems harmless compared to countless hours once spent bleeding credit card balances into gaming apps, but is it? Or is the rationale another wolf in sheep’s clothing, seeking to lure you back into its dark den? Please keep reading.
*Disclaimer: This feature regarding the question of “can you bet on yourself to win in sports, when you have a gambling problem?” is for the average enthusiast, and not anyone involved in amateur, collegiate, or professional sports, where gambling on oneself or one’s team is absolutely prohibited by organizational policy.
What to Consider When Wondering if it’s Safe to Make a Friendly Wager on Yourself in Casual Competition with Friends (and others) When You Have a Gambling Problem
There’s Always a “Chance”
Gambling is a term used to describe the wagering of something of monetary value with the hope of gain on the outcome of a game, contest, or other uncertain event where the result is determined by chance or the actions of others beyond a gambler’s control.
In referencing this definition, you may feel so confident in your ability to win against your opponent that betting on yourself does not feel like a wager, and therefore does not constitute gambling. And if it’s not gambling, it’s OK to do, right? This is what we refer to as a cognitive distortion in gambling. A cognitive distortion is a phenomenon found among gamblers who experience the illusion of control over a given outcome. And while you may have more experience and skill over the opponent/s in a given game of tennis or round of golf (et cetera), there is not a 100% certainty that you will win. As soon as any element of chance is involved, either through pure luck or an opponent performing better than usual, what you’re doing is gambling. From a behavioral health perspective, it’s best to keep the stakes about bragging rights, and that’s it.
It’s Technically Gambling in the Eyes of the Law
While friendly wagers amongst competitors (especially in golf) are very common, betting on your own game, even with friends, is technically considered illegal gambling in many jurisdictions across the United States. States that have not legalized any form of betting (i.e. Utah and Hawaii) consider it gambling as much as they do a game of “real money” poker in a neighborhood basement of bodega backroom. They could prosecute if they wanted to. Meanwhile, states that have legalized betting would technically require what you’re doing to fall under regulatory policy, and could take action as well.
Of course, the odds of legal action are about as slim as winning the Powerball, but that’s beside the point. The point, is that if friendly wagers amongst competitors at your local court, field, track, or course are technically considered gambling by law, then consider it gambling for your own mental health concerns.
It’s a Slippery Slope for Neurotransmitters
When you bet on yourself to win in competitive activities amongst friends, coworkers, and social leagues, the same neurotransmitters implicated in gambling behaviors are activated. Dopamine plays the most central role in the reward and pleasure associated with winning, while serotonin may influence impulse control and persist in encouraging you to “run it back” as soon as one game has concluded. Meanwhile, norepinephrine is also implicated in the sense of arousal that you feel when deeply engaged in betting on personal victory.
During your break or complete abstinence from gambling you’ve been taming your brain to not crave the release of these neurotransmitters with such ferocity. You have even been able to produce similar chemical reactions with healthier alternatives to gambling, which include the sports and athletics you’ve been participating in. Now is not the time to poke the proverbial bear and remind your brain how good it feels to ramp up those neurotransmitters without guardrails in place.
Some people, namely those who have only exhibited a mild form of problematic gambling behavior, may be able to make friendly wagers on their own competitive performances. But that must be approached with great care (learn more here). For the rest, it’s a very slippery slope. Why risk it when you’ve been successful thus far?
How to Respond When Asked
Considering everything above, you have decided that betting on yourself to win in sports, as someone who struggles with gambling, is not a good idea. But how should you respond when asked to make a friendly wager during a one-on-one or group competition?
If playing against friends and loved ones, you can follow our guide for how to tell someone you have a gambling problem (click here). You might feel vulnerable in doing so at first, but it will be effective in the long run. They won’t bring up friendly wagers again, and may even intervene when competitors who don’t know (and don’t need to know) suggest that bets are made.
And when disclosure is not something you’re comfortable with, just bluntly tell them that you prefer to leave betting off the table and instead focus on the pure love of the game. That’s what it’s all about, after all.
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